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Life of the Bored and Taskless.

Monday, December 26, 2005

Happy Holidays to everyone out there in cyberland.

I think coming home from college is akin to culture shock. Well, maybe not like culture shock, but it's shocking nonetheless. I've lived outside of the Baker/Dombroski bubble for a few months, and upon returning to residential headquarters, quite a few things have come to my attention, such as:

1. My family is possibly going to Hawaii. Now, when my mom talked about this possible future excursion, she used the term "we." My aunt asked, "Tracey, is Jacquie going?" Without hestitation (and making eye contact) she said, "No, she needs to find a job." Alright, I definitely understand that, but a) warn me before you exclude me and b) it's freaking Hawaii! I think I could arrange a couple days off from work.

2. Without telling me, my brother and dad hacked up my piano. As I walked into the living room, I saw the Christmas tree in an odd location. It suddently hit me, and my jaw dropped to the floor. "Oh, didn't your brother tell you?" my dad said. No, not really. My dad also said I should tell her that the "900-pound paperweight" (as she called it) is gone." Just to rub it in my dad said, "Hey Jack, do you feel that? (points to the woodstove) It's the piano." 'Tis the season to be jolly.

3. I've been trying to tone down my language lately, but apparently, my brother Kyle has kicked it up a notch. The first thing my brother said to me (after insulting me) was "Hey Jacquie, want some fucking cookies?" Yeah...he's 11. And he's the "good" one. Or was, I should say. Get me out of here.

4. The only thing that makes my mom and aunt get along during Christmas Eve is food, wine, and "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer." During the holidays, our family celebrates our healthy, non-dysfunctional relationships that we have with one another. I can't wait until my crazy grandmom comes into town. I'm already selling tickets for the family smackdown.

5. Sales are amazing. I've really grown to despise shopping (I really don't need to list reasons) but saving money makes it all worth it. I got a $50 gift certificate to Old Navy, and with $46 dollars I bought 2 pairs of jeans, 6 shirts (4 of them were $1.97 each) and a skirt. Now that's a Merry Christmas.

Well, I have to go unofficially babysit kids at my aunt's house now. Merry Breakmas, everyone!

4:10 PM | Jacquie | 0 comments links to this post

Sunday, December 18, 2005

10 current thoughts in the mind of Jacq:

1. I really miss my brothers. I just came back from seeing Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe. Several times when watching the good, Jesus (I mean lion)-following kiddos kick ass, I thought man, I wish I could fight some ice bitch with my brothers. Oh wait, that's what we do when we go see Botulism.

2. My first semester of college is over. Technically, 1/8 of my college career has already flown by, and although this fraction isn't very large, it's still something. I wrote the longest papers I've ever written, made Reeves Library (with 50 cent tea, mind you) my home, and made some friends along the way. Currently, I can't wait to get the hell out of here, but I heard "Morning Star" the other day and thought, "Hey, I could go for another exhausting round of Vespers." What can I say, Bethlehem has me whipped. (My desktop picture is of one of those fake mules in front of the Hotel Bethlehem. Yeah, it's that bad.)

3. God, I hope I don't get sick. Marina and a few others are sick, and knowing my luck, I'll have a flutastic Christmas. I have to go home and help my mom get ready for the arrival of Grammi (my crazy, theatrical maternal grandmother) and my two cousins. They're 13 and 14 and they're taller than me. Sigh.

4. I like making lists (see half of the posts I've written, and you'll notice this as well.)

5. I still have feelings for Drew. Sometimes I wish I were a robot, so my awkwardness could be blamed on faulty wiring or something and I wouldn't be so damn emotionally vulnerable. I just want him to say to me "No, Jacquie, me no likey you" or "Hey Jacquie, you want to make this less awkward and start where we left off unofficially?" or something because either I'm really dense or I just want some direction. I believe (and hope) that it's the latter of the two. Although I'm apathetic most of the time, when it comes to matters of the heart, I don't surrender easily unless someone makes it clear to me that there is no absolutely no chance. (ahem.)

6. You know, as supposedly unattractive as Billy Crystal is, there's just some quality about him that is adorable. I think it's his style of humor. Regardless of what it is, I'd like to give him a hug.

7. I really need some new CDs. Back when I had a job (babysitting: 8th-10th grade), I was making the big bucks ($21 for 2.5 hours). I used to buy a CD once every couple weeks. Now I'm a po' college student who has a hard time parting with a dollar (to wash or not to wash my clothes, that is the question...). Financially speaking, I miss the good ol' days.

8. Certain people (me) use certain types of statements (those of the parenthetical variety) way too much (but you can never have enough!) ("Shut it up, shut it up, you!").

9. Je suis un peu fatigue. For those of you non-Francophone readers, it means that I'm a little teapot. I'm short, and compared to August Jacquie, fairly stout. My size 0 pants aren't as flattering or comfortable as they used to be. No worries, however, I'll probably lose some weight over the break due to notorious lack of food in my house. If I don't, it's an excuse to go shopping with...oh, the nonexistent currency that I possess. Riiight... One more thing: I do have an ass now. That's right folks, the gossip is true after all. (Oh, and the first phrase actually meant that I'm a little tired, but if you didn't know that, then, uh, now you do...bitch.)

10. After my French exam tomorrow, I'm free until January 16th. I can't wait. I'm going to go to bed now so tomorrow will come faster, and because I'm a little teapot. I really need to stop doing that talking thing. Well, goodnight moon and goodnight all one of you.

11:58 PM | Jacquie | 0 comments links to this post

Friday, December 16, 2005

And now, an except from the article "Back in time" By Jackie Jackson (damn, I need to marry a Jackson so I can have that name):

"'Hundreds of artifacts were found,' said Tomkins, historian and treasurer of the historical society.

The finds thrilled Jacquie Baker, 15, of Warwick.

'This dig is different than some because we are actually finding things,' said Jacquie, who was on hand as part of her graduation project. She said she also often helps Braubitz, her great-aunt, facilitate archaeology programs."

...I'm so glad that I'm through with the whole graduation project shit (and talking to reporters about digging up shit, for that matter). Since then, I've gone on to bigger and better things. Like, er, college? Procrastinating? Oh wait, I did that then too. Nevermind, I haven't really changed at all, just relocated.

Speaking of procrastinating, I have half of a take home anthropology (different than archaeology) test finished and it's due tomorrow at noon. Huzzah for finals week.

I just want to go home, sit on my newly existant ass (I believe I've actually gained weight in that area) and watch cheezy Christmas movies while eating my own weight in chocolate. Right now...I really just want to make out with somebody. Perhaps it's the crazy collegiate hormones mixed with my own that's getting to my head...but damn it, I'm horny!

Well, on that note, I'll end this interesting post. Have a delightful weekend, if I don't talk to...well...this blog sooner. If anyone's reading this, I'm done with finals on Monday. Give me a call, (even if you don't want to make out with me)because I most likely won't have the internet. Yes, I'll have to be old-fashioned and use a cell phone like the pioneers did. I think they even had cameras in their phones, so perhaps I'm roughing it even more than those Conestoga wagon-riding pansies did.

3:07 PM | Jacquie | 0 comments links to this post

Me in a tree. Circa 1990.

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