Wednesday, May 09, 2007
I feel a shift in my life.
For once, things are going ideally, and I can actually chart my metamorphosis from adolescence into early adulthood. I have goals, and for the first time, they're not the New-Year's-Resolution-muse-about-them-once-when-in-the-shower-then-discard type of goals. I'm planning on graduating Summa Cum Laude, going to grad school, becoming financially independent from my parents (aunt) and blossoming into an amiable, competent individual with a somewhat zany perspective and sense of humor.
And if all of that doesn't pan out, there's always the military.
In all seriousness, before this point I have always found envisioning myself as an adult incredibly difficult. Perhaps it was due to my lack of soullessness and stoicism that I viewed as a necessary component of adulthood. Maybe it was because I lacked the relationship problems I viewed as a necessary component of marriage. Then again, I haven't exactly had the best adult role models.
In Psychology and Sociology, the adoption of "alternative role models" is usually viewed in a negative light (gang members become "family," etc.). However, I've found that my alternative role models have been, for the most part, one of the reasons why I've been fairly successful thus far in my life. Adult figures such as a select few of my friends' parents (minus the rednecks, drunks, and drunken rednecks), Nick (my former housemate) and even some of my own friends (not the prototypical "hoodlums" psychology and sociology dote on) have allowed me to compare and contrast aspects of myself and run trial-and-error situations vicariously.
Then there's my aunt. If I wanted to be nauseatingly cliche, I'd call her "my rock." She's the only relative I can a) express the sentiment of "love" completely honestly with b) be truly proud to be a blood relative of and c) see pieces of myself in. It would take days for me to spell out how grateful I am to have her in my life. The thousands of fans (~2) of this site would be exhausted, I'm sure.
Part of being an adult is cleaning up after yourself. It's always easy to make the mess, but it is exponentially more difficult to look at what you've done, take full responsibility for, and proceed to take action to amend the situation.
With that eloquent piece of faux-wisdom typed, I need to clean my room. So I'm not a full-fledged adult yet...but with my current mindset and drive, I think I'll get there in time.
After I've done my laundry, of course.
12:15 PM | Jacquie |