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Life of the Bored and Taskless.

Thursday, June 20, 2002

Wow. I think I saw "the light". I just made the realization that I have no life, and I think I'm losing friends. I made this conclusion because:

1) The guy I liked for the longest time and like now has never liked me, because he's always liked someone else.
2) Nobody invites me anywhere, instead I hear about how fun or bad everything was afterwards online. They BS about how they thought someone was going to call me. Uh huh. Riiiight.
3) The only people who send me e-mails anymore don't even know me. I DON'T WANT ANY PORN MAIL, DAMN IT! I used to get those forwards and crap, but at least people I knew sent them, and half of them weren't that bad.
4) I don't think I'm as preppy or as guy crazy as most of my friends are, and I can't dance, so I'm left out at a party. I only get invited to one, by the way, if I'm lucky.
5) I cry over the stupidest little things and I'm getting worse when it comes to laziness.
6) And finally, I occasionally talk to myself. Anyone who does that either has no friends or no life. Or both. In my case, it's the latter.

I think high school, once it gets done kicking my ass, will actually be alright. There's going to be a lot of change, but I think from what I've predicted, I'll come out a good person and not lose my morals or focus like I think some people will. My cousin, who's in the same grade as me and lives in Florida, loves high school for the fact that you meet new people "and the parties are great!". Well, for one, Floridian parties are probably 10 times better than anything you could do in PA just because of the nice location and beaches, and I won't get invited to them so screw it. If none of my close friends are in any of my classes, I'll have to start anew, and eventually I'll drift away from them and find who I really am. I hope I won't be a loner, but if I am, I can always just NOT have a social life and end up getting a scholarship because all will do in high school is attend classes, do extra-cirricular activities and community service and study hard. Wow, what a life that must be. I just visited East again today, and I'm still scared of it. I don't get over change that well, because when change happens for me, 9 out of 10 times it's for the worse. I hate change. I want to kick change's ass into space, but I have to realize that some changes are unwanted yet necessary in life. Sigh. I want to run back to Warwick Elementary and hide in the bushes.

Oh yeah, I just realize that nobody reads all of this shit except Jacquie.


10:29 PM | Jacquie | 0 comments

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